Fuck my brain.
I have been trying to not work at night anymore, and tonight I just had to, it is the end of the month and everyone is slamming us with rush orders.
So we are in for a hell of a week where I will be lucky to get 20 hours sleep over the next 4 days.
But, here is the rub, I am my most productive when the shit hits the fan like this. I just tore through a shit ton of work from 9:30 pm to 12:45 am. I am hitting send, grabbing my kindle fire and reading until my brain slows down enough for me to sleep. Takes about 15 minutes LOL!!
But really, why does it function so well this late a night when I am so fatigued physically so exhausted and yet finally my brain works like I just woke in the morning.
I am happy I can pull this shit off, but it freaks me out sometimes, especially when I am really busy and I can dig in like this.
I wonder if I could function better during normal working hours and this late night shit could be avoided. I guess that is what nags me. I get more done in 3 hours late at night than I will in 6 hours in the middle of the day at the office.
Maybe it is the lack of distraction, I am sitting here, headphones on Deadmau5 on, cranking along. In the middle of the day there are constant interruptions. Phone ringing, employees coming with questions, email buzzing....
All I know is this late night is when I "feel" my best mentally, when I am about to pass out in exhaustion is when I feel I can concentrate the best.
INSOMNIACS UNITE!!!
But really, I'm the exact same way. I work 10-12hr days regularly and my most productive 2 hours are the 2 hours after all the civilians go home and I can just blow through stuff. And I think my best solutions and work products come in the final moments before I go to sleep. My parents always told me I was a night owl. And my thing is once I get into that forward momentum, someone has to stop me or I'll keep going until I pass out. I once spent 48 hours awake working on a car and had 2 meals because it had to be finished for me to drive 14 hours back to college in 2 days. My mom had to force me to stop so I wouldn't kill myself from exhaustion.
Same here, my wife doesn't understand it.
If I'm preoccupied with something, I don't eat, don't feel hungry, don't feel tired and just plug away at whatever I'm doing. My 'best' hours are 2300 - 0400. All-nighters become habituary.
Of course, once finished, crash and burn...
Same here. I'm on quarters all week (long story) and so I have to stay home. I'm supposed to be resting, but I get in a one. I'm just exiting that zone now, so its time for a hard stop and full crash. haha
Inside my brain is scary shit. I tell people to go see a Cirgue du soleil show, what you see on stage mid performance, yeah that is inside my brain. I am positive the men that created that show are ADHD. When I saw my first show, I felt like I was at home and it made me happy.
My wife took many years to understand how I operate, what used to be a source of great frustration, she now deals with as she knows I cannot control it as much as I would like and the amount of my ADHD / Hyperactivity fluctuates greatly.
I do find when I am under intense pressure I level off really good and can stay on task. Hit me with a deadline that would make most have a breakdown and I am at my best.
Today / this week would be a perfect example. We are being bombarded (GREAT PROBLEM!!) and I have been in a zone all week.
Except I crashed hard last night, I know this because I turned off my alarm this morning and completely do not remember doing it, so I overslept by 1 hour.
That sounds like me. Bring the stress and stay out of my way. My boss gets pissed because when the shit hits the fan, I am generally the one calm as Hindu cattle. When the tension eases, I'm useless.
That's why I work on projects at night. Keep the mind running until I fall from exhaustion.